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Managing horses and a family

by | Jun 12, 2018 | Uncategorized | 0 comments

Understanding how we process sensory information can significantly influence how we experience nerves, anxiety, and fear when riding our horse. We use our ‘internal representational systems’, which refer to the primary ways we perceive and internalise our experiences through our senses, to make provide information about our experiences. Our mind filters and uses this information to make meaning of our subjective experience, as a point of reference for the future.

Our internal representational systems are visual (seeing), auditory (hearing), kinesthetic (feeling), gustatory (tasting), and olfactory (smelling). The processed information from each of these senses will impact how your unconscious mind processes your world and have an impact on how you feel about yourself, your horse and riding. 

Visual (Seeing)

If you tend to think in pictures, you might visualise potential problems while riding, like imagining a fall or picturing the horse becoming spooked. These vivid mental images can make you feel more anxious. To manage this, you can refocus your mind on visualising exactly what you actually want to happen, in as much detail as you can. Your mind really doesn’t know the difference between what’s real and what’s imagined, and will respond to precisely what you tell it! So using this to your advantage and use your brilliant imagination to create a visualised scenario where things happen exactly as you want them to, and where you manage any surprises with ease and confidence. 

Auditory (Hearing)

If you’re sensitive to sounds, the external noise of the horse’s hooves, your horse’s breathing, or sounds from the environment will all add to how you experience riding your horse. Internal sounds, such as your self-talk are also an important factor, since we often don’t realise quite how we speak to ourselves in our mind! Listening to calming music (where it’s safe to do so, obviously!), and positively managing your self-talk before and during your ride will help boost your confidence.

Kinaesthetic (Feeling)

If you are someone who is highly attuned to your feelings and emotions, you might be acutely aware of every physical sensation in your body and how it makes you feel. You might be aware of a knot in your stomach, tightness in your throat, or a very real feeling of having your legs turn to jelly! These type of physical sensations quickly transmit an alert to your mind, triggering nerves, anxiety and even fear. Practising deep breathing or other relaxation techniques can help you manage these physical sensations and reduce your anxiety.

Gustatory (Tasting)

As riders, the sense of taste is one we don’t often think about, and it’s closely tied to memory, where certain flavours can trigger emotional responses. I know of riders who chew minty gum before they ride (never chew gum while riding, as it is a choking hazard), and that minty sensation on their tongue can anchor feelings of readiness and confidence. Being mindful of what you eat or drink before riding and choosing flavours that you find comforting or refreshing can help trigger a shift in how you feel. 

Olfactory (Smelling)

Certain smells can evoke powerful emotional responses. I don’t know about you, but I love the slightly warm, sweaty smell of horses who have just worked (that sounds weird, doesn’t it?!). As a child, I dreamed of the smell horses, of leather tack, and even now the first fly spray of the summer brings a reminiscence of happy hacking days. Find those smells which make you feel good and remind you of happy times, then make use of these whenever you can. 

Recognising which of these sensory inputs resonates with you most will provide you with simple tools to improve your riding confidence. By consciously adjusting how you seek out and use these sensory inputs, you can help yourself feel more in control and less anxious while riding. 

Preferences

While each of us might have a preference for one or more internal representational systems, such as visual, auditory, or kinesthetic, it’s important to note that we don’t exclusively use just one; our mind gathers and uses information from all of them. Think of it like having a favourite tool in a toolbox; even though you might prefer one tool, you still use the others when the situation requires it.

For instance, even if you primarily process your experience in a primarily visual way by imagining scenarios and pictures in your mind, your mind will still also pay attention to what you hear, the physical sensations you feel, the tastes and smells that surround you. Each sense provides a different piece of the puzzle, contributing to a fuller understanding and experience of your environment.

This means when you’re riding your horse and trying to manage anxiety, even though you might focus on using your preferred sensory channel, such as visualising calm and successful rides, you’ll also benefit from tuning into the sounds that calm you, the feel of the horse beneath you, and even calming scents or flavours. Using a combination of all your senses can help create a richer, more grounded experience that can be more effective in managing your nerves.

Simple Tips

Visual

Focus on shifting your mindset by vividly imagining positive outcomes. Instead of letting your mind linger on potential challenges, picture yourself riding smoothly, handling challenges with ease, and finishing your ride successfully. This practice of visualisation can help build your confidence and reassurance. 

Auditory

Integrate calming sounds into your daily routine to help soothe your nerves. This could be as simple as listening to the radio while you tack up, or repeating positive affirmations to yourself such as “I am calm and in control” or “I trust my abilities and my horse.” These auditory cues can help create a mental environment of calmness and positivity.

Kinesthetic

Use physical relaxation techniques to reduce anxiety and physical tension. Before riding, try doing some gentle stretches, deep breathing exercises, or progressive muscle relaxation—where you tense and then relax different muscle groups. This not only relaxes your body but also prepares your mind for a more comfortable and focused ride.

Gustatory

Choose flavours that evoke a sense of calm and enjoyment for you. This might mean having a peppermint or a piece of dark chocolate before you ride or sipping herbal tea like chamomile which is known for its soothing properties. These tastes can trigger positive sensory memories and help calm your nerves.

Olfactory

Introduce a comforting and familiar scent into your riding environment. This could be applying a dab of lavender oil on your wrist or adding a few drops of tea tree oil to your riding gear. The smell of chamomile can also be soothing. These scents can significantly enhance your emotional state by triggering positive associations and reducing stress, creating a more relaxing atmosphere for both you and your horse.

By actively engaging these sensory strategies, you can better manage your emotions and enhance your overall riding experience. Each tip is designed to help you focus, relax, and enjoy your time with your horse, making your rides more pleasant and successful.

 

In conclusion, understanding how your internal representational systems influence your emotions can help you manage your nerves and anxieyt around riding. By recognising your preferred internal representational systems, you can use different strategies to feel calmer and more in control, so you can become a more confident rider. 

Managing horses and a family

www.theeverydayequestrian.co.uk

I had my little girl 20 months ago, and it has been an absolutely whirlwind. We never really planned to have children; we’d always talked about it but had got to a point where we simply didn’t think it was meant to be. Now I was never ‘mumsey’ or remotely maternal; I had no idea about what to do with babies or children, and really was a bit rubbish about it all, which was fine, because I was too busy out competing! I’d be out and about virtually every weekend and horses were my life. Well, they still are, but now I have to try to find some kind of ‘balance’ between horses, my little family, the ‘proper’ day job as a college lecturer, and my freelance teaching and coaching business… ooh and blogging too obviously! Spare time simply does not exist and I work ridiculously hard to try to get everything done. On time… ish.

I mostly look like I’ve been dragged through a hedge backwards; oh how I’d love to be one of those gorgeous mummies on social media who always seem to look beautifully presented (yes, I know, none of it is real!).

The honest truth is that my priorities have changed; I’m no longer driven by the need to go out & prove myself every weekend, jumping bigger, faster & more difficult tracks. I just have lost the drive to make those things happen anymore. On the flip side, I really do miss those long days out & about, and I guess the biggest loss is the lack of riding goals. I would live to ride through qualifiers to progress to championships, and I relished the challenge of moving up a level. I can honestly say that I loved every minute of it, but the reality is that competing really doesn’t fit with my current goals & as my horse is getting older and less athletic, I don’t feel comfortable pushing him anymore; it just doesn’t feel right or fair to him.

So managing lifeas a whole is a bit of a challenge, but I suspect that’s nothing unusual! Somehow, I have to balance my priorities and keep the plates spinning. There are no hard & fast rules about how to make this work, but here are my tools of the trade:

  • Write everything down! I keep a notebook in my handbag & try to get things written down as soon as they pop into my head, otherwise whooshthey’ve disappeared & never return
  • Keep an old-fashioned diary. I just cannot get on with online apps etc., especially when I’m at yards without 4G!
  • Limit when I use social media; it’s just such a time waster! I know that I get drawn in & end up getting lost down the rabbit hole.
  • Create a to-do list, which I try to write at the end of the day before when things are buzzing around my brain; if I try to do it in the morning, I know I’ll miss something important
  • Get back to people as soon as I can. This helps me to keep on top of horses, clients & childcare.
  • Set myself mini-goals, for example if there’s a job or task I don’t particularly want to do then I give myself 20 minutes to make a start on it. This makes it seem more achievable, rather than thinking about having to do all of it in one big hit, which could take hours. This also often means that if I can just get started, then I’ll get immersed in it, and end up working for longer than 20 minutes anyway.
  • I try really hard not to get distracted by work or my phone when I’m with my daughter. I found myself texting people back while I’m with her, or checking facebook, and it’s just such a rubbish thing to do! I always feel like I don’t spend enough time with her anyway, so not giving her my whole attention is even worse.
  • Communicating with my hubby! Yep, so we used to do whatever we pleased prior to having our little girl, but now we actually have to speak to each other! Which is hilarious, but necessary. We very quickly found out that we cannot just do our own thing anymore, and it is essential that we discuss our plans & commitments so that everyone stays happy (and sane!). No we haven’t cracked it yet, and things often go wrong, but let’s just say it’s a work in progress…
  • Just try to enjoy those crazy times at the yard with your son/daughter – it will all go by so very quickly, and even when it’s carnage & your little one is causing chaos, it really will all be fine; remember, tomorrow is just another day and a chance to try again!

 

I still have goals and ambitions with horses, but the goalposts have moved now. In the next few years, I hope to get back riding & competing, but other parts of my life are more important right now. All I can say is ‘watch this space’…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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